I’m listening to Alina Orlova. I love her music. It’s like my life. So bumpy, so dynamic, intense and pretty. I can see my life going past in pictures, like in an old film. Frames. In french. So beautiful.
I saw her quite a few times in Vilnius oldtown during this week. Today even twice. Wow.
I have the pictures of the town I have taken yesterday with my old Zenit camera. I’m pleased. People said they were certainly different. Urbanized historical architecture, streets, old buildings and well, Vilnius the way I see it. I will try to take more photos from now on.
You know. I thought and thought and thought again. I think too much. I want to just enjoy it.
I realised I have never been so happy before. I’m in love, next year is going to be exciting and new, since I’m off to uni, I can listen to music I love, wear the most amazing clothes, take pictures of the cities I adore, paint and read poetry all I want. There is nothing missing in my life. Most people like me, and I love everyone. It’s too perfect to be true.
And so I have my life in my hands, just like a crystal ball, so beautiful and so fragile. The earth is spinning. Times flows like a river.
Am I happy with “myself”? Maybe. I’m ok. But I’d like to stop wondering so much if I’m worthy enough to have what I have. Just to live. Take most. Give most.
i like when people are happy. I feel a need to give something to someone. Somehow. I just don’t feel complete if I don’t spread something good.
Also i have a bad habit of over analysing things. I will try to just live. Nothing matters but this minute. Now.
And I’m free.
